Wow, it feels a bit awkward writing this after so long away… Almost like it’s wrong to assume that anyone is still out there, visiting me, after I’ve ignored this space for months at a time! Or walking into a room and having everyone stop talking and stare at you while you stand there nervously fidgeting. The one who’s missed all the news and updates. The outsider.
I’m not really sure why I stopped blogging. I just did.
It wasn’t a concious decision. It just was.
Well, technically that’s not quite true. I just stopped finishing posts and making them live. I have occasionally written something, had to set it aside unfinished for whatever reason, and have just not gone back to finish it. So I have quite a number of draft posts waiting to be finished!
Mostly, if I’m honest, I just stopped wanting to “put everything out there…”
I could spend ages unpacking that statement, but I won’t.
All you really need to know is that this year hasn’t been our best…
For the most part there has been a lot of periods of “survival mode” and extremely emotional family health issues that just have no place being shared on the internet. Because even though they have affected me a lot, they are not my stories to share. I just hold a supporting role. And because these “life events” have been all consuming, there hasn’t been a lot of other interesting stuff to to tell. There sure hasn’t been time for getting creative!!
1 month ago we celebrated our first anniversary of moving back to New Zealand. It snuck up on us suddenly, and went by without much notice, but in my own heart I acknowledged it and I reflected.
SO much has changed in the last year! We have crammed so much in that in many ways it feels entirely impossible that it’s only been a year, but at the same time the move feels so recent.
I continue to wait until the “honeymoon period” wears off and for any regret to come.
Unbelievably it hasn’t… I am now certain that it won’t.
Our move just continues to feel right, and for the first time in years my heart feels the peace of being “home”.
Moving here was the start of a new chapter for our family. A big change.
1 year on and we are about to turn a page and start another new chapter.
This one feels almost just as big, if not bigger…
In a few weeks Abbie, our youngest child, turns 4. She will start kindergarten full-time at the beginning of the next school turn, which means that my “stay at home baby rearing days” are officially over. (*sniff, sob, how did this happen so quickly?!).
I have been offered and have accepted a full-time job.
It has been hugely scary but exciting to accept.
So so many emotions all at once!
I have been extremely blessed to find a job less than 2 minutes drive from where the kids attend school/kindy. Not only that but it’s a job I think I will love and one still with a bit of a creative element to it. I cannot tell you how rare as hens teeth that is here. I had resigned myself to the fact that I would have to commute to the big city for work (an hour each way from me) which was so undesirable that I cannot even begin to tell you! Then I found this job and have been lucky enough to get it. I couldn’t be more thrilled! I start next Monday.
Over the weekend I had to go through my entire wardrobe and do a stock take. It has been 7 years since I have worked full time, so needless to say it needed some serious reorganisation and a bit of a rethink! As I tried on clothes to see what still fit after bearing 2 children (ha – very little), and wrote a list of things I’d need to purchase in preparation, I could not help but recall a poem I wrote a few years ago called “the other girl…” It was about staring at my wardrobe feeling like two completely different selfs.
To a certain extent I still do feel like that, but I will have to work out how to merge my colourful self with my black & white wardrobed corporate self because it’s happening next week ready or not!
I’m not sure how things will change with my blog after I start back at work. Perhaps I will get a fresh wind after this unintended sabbatical? Then again, perhaps with my already busy life turning up another notch there just won’t be time?
If I say I will then notoriously I won’t, and vice versa, so instead I’ll just say “we’ll see”.
That’s all I can offer.
I still really want to finish blogging my renovations. We are having some professional photos taken at home this weekend so perhaps that will help.
Until next time
I’m out here! I’m listening waiting to soak up all of your news! Kat, there’s no obligation to blog. Blog when you want to blog and I love to read what you want to share. I love your creativity, your sense of humor and your big heart and will take it when it pops up. I’m so very delighted to hear about your new job! What a wonderful wonderful adventure
Congratulations on your new job. It must be scary after a long time away from the world of ‘formal work’ – you have been working all along. I’m sure you will be brilliant at it as you put so much effort into the things you do. Best wishes.
I’m here….checking your blog every couple of days…..hoping that all is well in your world and you are all doing ok. Congrats on the job!
I’m still reading and listening. I do so love your updates and can’t believe that it’s already been a year since your move!! Best of luck at your new job and know that there will be people ready to listen when you want to talk
Nice to hear from you Kat, and to know that things are going well after your move. It will be great if you continue blogging, but hey, sometimes life needs to be lived.
I too am still listening, so pleasantly surprised to see you pop up on my blog reader. I am glad to hear that even though your family has been through a tough time that you still feel content with your move back to nz.
Kat that is wonderful news about your job and your contentment with your move. Life is life and sometimes the ride is a bit crazier than we expect. If you blog, I’ll be here, if you don’t I’ll still be here supporting you from the other side of the ditch.
Congratulations on the new job. Sounds great. All the best.
Life can be scary, exciting,stressful and overwhelming at times, but it’s your life and it’s always moving,never apologise for not blogging! I am the most erratic blogger lately but my real life is a lot more important than my blogging life, at times.
Enjoy returning to the world of grown ups you will appreciate your home life all the more LOL
SMILE!
How lovely to find a post from you in my inbox, but life is always changing, I have loved your blog posts thru your move & renos but understand that real life/family is so much more important to a person than the buzz of internet friends……much as we have loved you sharing so much with us, you can’t & mustn’t feel guilt or frustration over not having time or inclination to ‘entertain’ the masses on the internet.
Enjoy your new changes & challenges as you step into your new job.
Lynn Qld
I’m here too! I can hardly believe it’s already been a whole year since you moved back to NZ – it just doesn’t possible!
Congrats on your new job – I know it will be everything you hope. It’s wonderful that it is so close to the girls’ school(s) and not a long commute every day. If it is creative, you don’t HAVE to only wear corporate black & white do you? Zing ’em with a little pop of color!
I do hope you can occasionally blog for us, but don’t worry if it’s only once in a while – we’ll take what we can get! And we’ll try not to whinge too much. Maybe.
OXO
I’m still here as well! Congrats on the new job!! That’s really exciting.
I totally understand dropping blogging for awhile. I have seriously considered doing so but just post intermittently as I feel led to. No harm in that!
If you decide to keep posting, you do have people who will read. But do what’s best for your family!
I’m still here too. I was thinking about you just the other day when I saw some of the telephone box fabric in my scrap box – it’s in the quilt block I made for you. I hope the health stuff improves for you and your loved ones. Good luck with your new job. I’m sure it’ll be grand!
It was great to see your back! Whatever you choose to do thanks for all the great tips, they’re much appreciated 😀 Do what your heart tells you to do. All the best with the new job and have a fab first day x
Blog what you want, when you can- that’s the best you can do!
Feel no guilt for the unfinished posts (we’ve all got them). I bet that if you look around at your blogging friends you’ll find that lots of them are blogging far less these days too.
Good luck with your new job! Expect absolute exhaustion in the first wee while as you get used to it all, but lets hope that the creativity and blogging bug bites again. O
ur family are hoping to be up in your part of the world in May next year so please stay in touch and we’ll get together. Good luck! J x
How wonderful about the job! I am so glad you were able to find a position that makes good sense to you and is so close to home. Whatever you decide on the blog will be fine, when you pop in here I will eventually come to read it, my reader holds it for me until I have an opportunity. It is challenging for everyone to juggle it all, all the time.
What will you be doing in your new position?
Congrats on the new job..look forward to hearing a little more about it. Xxxx
I’m here!! I’m listening!! I know I feel in the same boat about blogging many days. Also hearing you on the life events not being yours to share – currently living that slipstream. We moved home to New Zealand almost three years ago – a difficult decision – one I assumed I’d regret, but there really is no place like home. Although sometimes in the deep cold winter I dream for the Queensland temperatures I’d become acclimatised to! That and during the new season clothing shopping wishing I could portal across to downtown Melbourne or Sydney!
xx
Congrats on the job! I hope you find time for creative adventure and documenting on the blog too!
It’s nice to hear from you again! It’s so difficult to be a wife, mother, as well as everything else we try to be. I hope you find enjoyment in your new job and that your family adjusts to the changes. Kids are pretty flexible, which is always good news! I would love to see an up-date of your home, so will be checking back every once in awhile to see if you have posted something new. Take care!
I have been away from blogging also..sometimes life just goes on at a record pace and change just blindsides you. Congratulations on your new job! Hopefully the transition from stay at home mum to working woman will be fun! Once things settle down for you, you will find time for your creative self and learn how to juggle everything that a working woman has to do…thinking of you..
Still love you and am here when you are